Is it worth $10? No
â€śFun Sizeâ€ť is amoral, unfunny and a chore to sit through. Worse, it takes some situations with children so nonchalantly that it becomes uncomfortable to watch. If ever a movie sends the wrong message to kids, this is it.
For example, thereâ€™s a scene in which a lost eight year-old boy, Albert (Jackson Nicoll), goes into a convenience store. The clerk, Fuzzy (Thomas Middleditch), likes Albert so much that he asks Albert to join him on a mission, and Albert, who is mute, agrees. To be clear, I am not a parent. But how can anyone watch Fuzzy talk Albert into his car and not think horrible, awful things? Thankfully nothing bad happens, but itâ€™s such a terrible message that you feel sorry for parents who need to convince their non-believing kids that itâ€™s always a bad idea to get in a car with a stranger.
No worries, though, because things get worse for Albert from there. To backtrack: High school senior Wren (Victoria Justice) is stuck babysitting Albert on Halloween after their flaky mother (Chelsea Handler) ditches at the last minute to go to a party with her much-younger boyfriend Keevin (Josh Pence). Wren takes Albert trick-or-treating, during which Albert gets lost in a haunted house. With the help of geeky nice guys Roosevelt (Thomas Mann) and Peng (Osric Chau) Wren desperately looks for Albert, but gets tricked into going to a party by her friend April (Jane Levy), who wants Wren to hook up with hottie Aaron (Thomas McDonell).
With a best friend who cares so little about Wrenâ€™s family, Wren doesnâ€™t need enemies. She does, however, need director Josh Schwartz to keep her out of such cheap jokes as a motorized chicken humping a station wagon. Wren could also use a little brother who looked like he actually wanted to be found, because really, if Albert doesnâ€™t care about finding his family neither will we. And the last thing Wren needs is to realize what a stale, unrealistic clichĂ© it is for her to even consider the nice guy after a bad boy whom all the girls adore professes his love for her.
Here are a few positives that keep â€śFun Sizeâ€ť from being completely deplorable: Justice has good screen presence and is pretty, so better material could lead to her becoming a legit movie star. There are a few funny moments, including the timely use of Josh Grobanâ€™s â€śYou Raise Me Upâ€ť for a good laugh, and the movie is less than 90 minutes, which equates to a mercy killing.
Does this outweigh the fact that thereâ€™s condoned kidnapping, child abandonment, leaving the scene of an accident, shooting, drinking and driving, littering and destruction of personal property in a movie aimed at young teens? Absolutely not. Granted the film is rated PG-13, but parents, trust me: Keep your children and yourselves as far away from â€śFun Sizeâ€ť as possible.Â
Did you know?
Justice has starred in the child-friendly Nickelodeon TV series â€śZoey 101â€ť and â€śVictorious.â€ť
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