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Is it worth $10? No
“Spy Kids: All The Time In The World” promises 3D innovation from Robert Rodriguez, who’s always been ahead of the curve technologically, and it’s another adventure in a franchise that nicely appeals to kids. Better, the “Aromascope” scratch-and-sniff cards offer an immersive experience unlike any seen in theaters in many years.
And it’s all such an incredible disappointment.
Every single aspect of this film is a failure – it’s not engaging, funny or interesting, the visual effects look cartoonish, the acting is wooden and the Aromascope is an absolute joke. Writer/director Rodriguez is so hit (“Sin City”) and miss (“Spy Kids 3D, “Machete”) that’s it’s now hard to get excited for anything he does.
You know it’s going downhill fast from the start. A very pregnant spy named Marissa (Jessica Alba) takes down a time-altering villain named Tick Tock (Jeremy Piven) after her water breaks. Flash to a year later and she’s living the quiet domestic life with her spy-hunting TV-star husband (Joel McHale), step kids Rebecca (Rowan Blanchard) and Cecil (Mason Cook) and the newborn baby. Then a villain called The Timekeeper appears and Marissa is forced back into action.
Original “Spy Kids” stars Alexa Vega (who looks a lot like Lindsay Lohan) and Daryl Sabara have extended cameos, but the spirit, ingenuity and earnestness of the first two films are lost here. In its place are bad visual effects, a total lack of fun and terrible dialog; if adults had to take a drink every time the word “time” was used they’d be passed out on the floor in ten minutes.
As for the Aromascope (see below), it was absolutely terrible. How it works: When a number flashes on screen, scratch the corresponding number on your scratch and sniff card. The problem: All eight scents smelled the same, which you have to consider a blessing considering we were supposed to smell puke, farts, dog farts and other unmentionable aromas. If you thought it may be distracting to have to scratch and sniff on eight separate occasions, rest assured you’ll be happy for the distraction.
Late in the film Rodriguez has a wholesome message about making the most of the time you have, but even that feels patronizing and forced. “Spy Kids: All The Time In The World” may not be the worst movie of the year, but it is a complete failure in all ways imaginable.
Did you know?
The last time anything like Aromascope was attempted was 1981 when John Waters released “Polyester” in “Odorama.” It sucked too.
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teslop6
said:
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... I would have to concur with the observations of the writer in the article. I was not very engaged into the movie. The cards that you are to smell with had very little scent and it is probably a good movie for 6-9 year olds. |
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